I'm so glad to hear this. Thank goodness the other kids are stepping up. ((Hugs, JRI))

Emergency pleas from SD.  "Have Dad call, I'm in a shelter and have to be out by Tuesday."   This is probably more honest, earlier it was "I'm in a hotel".  Since Monday, it's been "Can you use your AAA to have my car towed, tell them blah blah" (no, I'm not going to do that), "I need .my car title" (if you default on another car loan, we won't pay like last time), "I don't have any money" (he's given you $1300 this past month plus you get $1200 monthly disability and have only 2 bills since youve been living with C rent free), "I don't have any food", and I can't recall all the rest of it.

I feel a huge sense of relief after blocking her and on the advice of DS and YSS, have blocked her daughter, C, too.  I actually increased the volume of my incoming phone calls so I can really hear them now.  According to DS, YSS is 150 percent committed, has a plan for temporary housing, the car and the legal problems.  I frankly don't want to know the details unless they affect me.  
 

Last edited by JRI (10/31/2026 11:04 pm)

JRI, your post made me sigh with relief. Your SD is a danger to you and your husband. I’m so glad the kids are stepping in and putting a hard stop to that woman. And seriously, she has mental issues but she knows what she’s doing. She is a user and manipulator. Getting that restraining order in place will help you be able to rest. Best to you. And big hugs.

Well done sweetie,  you have, in good faith,  given this woman the benefit of doubt for far too long. She has abused both you and her father, and you have been manipulated into feeling responsible for her poor actions and decisions.
The 'hard stop' that I recommended was something that we had to do after years of narcissistic manipulation and gaslighting . It's difficult,  but your sense of relief will grow more and more.  Your conscience should be clear because this is all down to her. ❤️

💪♥️

I so glad to hear that you have blocked them. It gives you peace and you can truthfully tell DH that you have not heard from her. (I would have no guilt for him not knowing that they are blocked).

I’m sure SD does not like the shelter. Shelters have rules. They expect residents to follow them. They are well acquainted with the ‘poor me’ resident and know how to deal with them. They know her playbook well and it will not work. There is help, but it comes with expectations and consequences that they will enforce. 
At this point I equate SD to the alcoholic who has to hit their bottom before they can become sober. Now that her family has stopped propping her up, maybe, just maybe, she has hit her bottom, and will accept the shelter help.

Stay strong. Keep her blocked.

The last thing you and DH need is a well meaning friend taking up SD65's cause and coming to you for help for her - that would almost be worse than having to deal with SD directly.  Perhaps this friend needs to be told clearly not to become a go-between. 

Good for you JRI- enough is enough.