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- JRI
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SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
SD65 sent a text, she wants DH to call and also wants her car title. We hold the title ever since she defaulted on a title loan which DH had to repay. I told DH who said "ugh" but boo hoo, with his dementia, he apparently forgot to call her. I'm sure she will be texting again. Actually, it's probably not a problem to sell it since the plates are over due, she hasn't paid personal property tax in years, it won't pass inspection and she has neither car insurance nor license since hers was revoked. Stay tuned, it never, ever stops.
Last edited by JRI (10/27/2026 4:07 pm)
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
Good grief. The Neverending Nightmare.
- JRI
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
Yes, never-ending. 52 years and still going strong.
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Thread Starter- JRI
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
I take it back, it hasn't been 52 continuous years of her chaos. Her second marriage lasted about 20 years, with a 2- year separation midstream. Her DH#2 is/was a saint so I'm sure he absorbed most of her dysfunction. She had 2 kids with him, both are estranged from her with that daughter, M, vocal about keeping SD away from her kids
So, for my part, we had the early years of our marriage, say about 6 or 7 years, with her moving in and out 2 or 3 times. I think she really wanted to live with her mom but between their ugly fights and BM's new DH, it never worked for long. Once she got out of high school, she went to cosmetology school then married DH#1 and had her daughter, C. Things were quiet for the couple years they were married then she was back here for about a year til DH#2. Then, the 20 years with DH#2, then evictions from 2 apartments til she landed here for a year. By then, drugs were an issue, that hasn't been the case in the past. So, combine her poor judgement with drugs and nowadays, she's worse than ever. And, now she's close to being homeless, has terrible health and has burned bridges with everyone.
So, actually it hasn't been 52 years at this level and I think DH absorbed many tearful phone calls during my working years. But now that we are here together all the time, I'm getting the full volume, especially now that he's unwilling ir unable to answer his own phone.
Last edited by JRI (Yesterday 1:02 am)
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- StandingStrong
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
I just want to say I’m so sorry for what you are having to deal with in senior years. Big hugs.
I’ve been out of town and caught up on your posts. JRI, I say this with all love, respect and compassion. Something needs to be done with your SD. Her behaviors are elder abuse. You deserve some peace. Whether that’s the other adult kids standing up to her or banning her from your home, you should really think about putting her on full stop. I’d even demand supervised visits with her father because she is constantly conning him out of money.
I follow your story closely because I have several of your “SD’s” in my world. I can see them trying to do this to their dad. Again, big hugs. Your SD and I are the same age. SMH
- JRI
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
Thanks for the support, Standing. To my surprise, DH89 is not responding. Yesterday, I told him about her text and he said ugh, I guess she wants money but did not call her. I put it down to his dementia. She texted again today, heightened emergency, have dad call. I told him and even let him read the text. Nothing. Tho I don't usually reply to her, I told her I'd told him about both her requests, je, it's not me keeping her away from him. She said her daughter, C, told her I'd said I'd call the police if she showed up. So, that seemed to put a stop to unannounced visits. Who knows what will happen next. She said she's living in a hotel and mentioned a social worker but you can't believe anything she says.
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Thread Starter- notarelative
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
As to the hotel, my guess is a shelter (unless she convinced someone to pay for a hotel). Shelters here have outreach workers, who she may be calling a social worker.
Hopefully, she actually has a social worker. SD65 may not like the solution the social worker finds for her, but unless she can rope someone into housing her, she'll have to take it.
As to telling DH about her request, I'd mumble it as an aside while he was distracted. Then I could legitimately say I told him. With my DH's memory issues he'd never remember if I did or didn't. My goal is to keep as much of his kids' current mess (and they both have one) away from him as I can. There is no actual way for him to help.
- JRI
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Re: SD65 Wants DH to Call, also Wants Car Title
Notarelative, your last few sentences are exactly how I feel. "My goal is to keep as much of his kids current mess away from him as I can. There is no actual way for him to help". The other 2 of his kids keep their own messes (and we all have them) to themselves, like you and I and any mature person does for their aged parents. SD is just so self-centered, it's unbelievable
I don't know or care if she's in a shelter, hotel or whatever and I'd have to see it with my own eyes to believe it anyway. I'd like to believe she has a social worker but whatever. I was thinking about blocking her but I don't know if I can do that in good conscience while DH is alive.
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