Oh, don't you hate it when somebody's problems end up being solved by moving in with you.  We have 5 kids and have seen this with 4 of them, multiple times by SD64.  I've solved it now, I've dismantled the basement area where they used to land.

As SMs of toxic skids, we do develop that "psychic ability," probably for self-protection.
I laughed out loud over the bug situation . . . in the jungle. 

Kes wrote:

YSD27 sounds a lot similar to SD31, with the projection of her  issues onto others and the failure to adult.  If I were you I'd make it clear to DH that she is not welcome to come and live at yours. She's been an adult for a number of years, she needs to take responsibility for herself. 

Oh but you don't understand. SD27 is SOOOoooooo beaten down in the dumps and she NEEEEDS us. Lol  
 

YSD27 sounds similar to SD31 who also cant hold a ( legit, legal job anyway) down for very long and well just cant still handle much as an adult. Something or someone is always at fault for her failures,its never her. To hear her complain about how Life is not fairrr for HER  you'd think no one else has ever had problems at work or with anything else. Its just the whole world is conspiring against her. Was going to ask this a separate post, but I don't know about YSD27, but I know mine isn't above actually blaming her genes, and her parents  are to blame because she didnt ask them to bring her into such a cruel and punishing world but "they made her". These are her exact words, Wondering if you were fed that kind of garbage as an excuse from the steps..while they expect you to actually accept it with a straight face.

Last edited by LittleTypeAmy (7/14/2026 4:19 pm)

JRI wrote:

I haven't heard SD64 blame her genes or parenting for her life difficulties caused by her own actions.  But what strikes me as I hear about these "poor, unlucky, downtrodden" SKs is that I'm guessing parents and stepparents threw time, money, emotion, thought and every possible asset into raising them.   At some point, they all need to man up or girl up and run their own lives. 

You got that right. Its high time to tell these SKIDS that they seriously need to get over themselves!! They aren't that special or exceptional as they think they are in their minds.
I don't know ONE human or living being on this earth that is able to ASK permission and her blessing to be born into existence.
Ask me why I stopped trying to relate and reason with someone who is emotionally immature enough to actually be convinced otherwise, 
I am surprised she hasn't thought of trying to sue her parents for conceiving her without consent. She and our other skids would be the ones to do it too...
I also don't know of Anyone who is living on Easy street all the time either. Its tough out there for everyone.  But in the SKIDS world, it just tough for THEM as the constant victims of circumstances, and they are too caught up in that victim mode to see that this woe is me is just old and tired especially at their ages. Then wonder why people, even the ones who enabled it, wise up and distance from their behavior. 
 

Last edited by LittleTypeAmy (7/15/2026 6:22 am)

Merry wrote:

I have a prediction too!

SS will lose his current job due to some version of he’s smarter than his boss.

He can usually hang on to a job for six months, sometimes a year, so we’ve got some time for the particulars to develop.

Ahh yes, same here with SD, someone who has no self esteem which is why she tries to convince people shes so smart and so grownnnn meanwhile she is anything but that, If she were, she would be able to hold at least a min wage job for more than a minute, but says shes too good for that,,sticks her snotty nose at that idea....yet shes not too good to mooch off state assistance or earn money in ways outside the law that are stupid and risky,,, But shes soooo much smarter than anyone else though , fine with letting her live with that delusion...

Last edited by LittleTypeAmy (7/15/2026 4:59 pm)

Oh, no, worst outcome.  But, how about adopting BM's ploy and charging rent?  You'd probably be ok with it but if your DH is like mine, he wouldn't want to burden his poor little baby with nasty rent.  When I bought the condo for SD64 to live in, I charged her $400 monthly for part of the condo fee.  I wanted her to get used to paying a bill monthly.  Well, every month,, she'd come over and first have a "private discussion" with DH.  You know what that meant, she was always short due to some "emergency".

Last edited by JRI (8/07/2026 11:16 am)

I am also backing up JRI's suggestion is to charge her for rent or to chip in for utilites, etc. just make this leech of a so called adult SD responsible for something, These skids have had more than enough opportunities to at least try to be adults so its high time for them to be held to that standard.
That  ended up working for me the last time my own moocher SD31 has pulled the same tactic as yours, Just showing up unannounced  at our door with all her stuff, without my permission naturally once with her then toddler child of her own in tow, expecting to live with me and DH rent free, to be used as a taxi service, free food , laundrry service,  other comforts for FREE, because she is all about what she can get for free free free.
The minute I told her she was there for more than enough time for an arrangement that was "promised" to be "temporary" ( yeah right, we know that's BS, it never is with them) and that her time was UP,  especially since she wasn't pulling any sort of weigh to change her situation whatsoever.
the moment any shred of accountability was placed in her court, she flew, well more like stormed off and left in a rage like a bat out of hell as quickly as she had arrived...no gratitude at all considering she was lucky she was "allowed" to stay as long as she did.  I was more than delighted to just let her scrounge around for someone else to sponge off instead, which she did immediately after I "kicked" her out which she would say. ,and had bounced around to a bunch of different places to squat at as she quickly wore out her welcome at each one then too.and of course, some of these skids never learn.
In years since her exit, hasn't stopped her from showing up unannounced with weeks worth of laundry, not only hers and her children;s but that of her fiances too. Dragged one of her kids with her to try to entertain who was being a brat since she didnt want to be there anyhow. THEN because a one time courtesy I didn't plan to grant wasn't good enough, she just volunteered our space as her personal laundromat, /day care too...announcing at the end that she planned to make this an every weekend thing, as if DH and I would never have anything better to do that wash her boyfriends nasty dirty drawers. I told DH no to just that, stating that would be fine, so long as she gets charged the same as a laundromat if she expects to use me as one, she could at least be expected to contribute to our electric and or water bill which were rising enough as it was at the time. Welp, once again in true SKID fashion, after my proposal, she shut down that idea really fast once it was made known this was something else she wasn't getting for free on our dime and never heard from her again asking for any favors from me and taking advantage. Long story short, holding SD27 accountable  AND just refusing to go out of your way to make sure she is comfortable at your place is worth a shot, 
**Side note.. just like with your BM, I admit I got the idea to make SD contribute financially from my BM, whom I rarely give credit to for well anything...when SD was whining to me how BM had started charging SD at least 10 bucks a day whenever SD expects to dump off her two out of control children in BMs lap, the other grandma must have gotten tired of it too since she followed suit. SD was sooo offended, but you know youve burned someone else out when they get to the point where they ask to be paid for babysitting their own grandchildren. 

Last edited by LittleTypeAmy (8/08/2026 7:12 am)

You all are right.  Charging "something", whether it's some cash rent or set of chores, makes the freeloaders either leave or think twice before landing at Daddy's door with another sad story.  You have to be willing to be the "bad, mean SM"" but we are that already 

Last edited by JRI (8/08/2026 11:38 am)

Seriously, at what point do we have to keep being expected to adjust and rearrange our lives to cater to these beyond grown SKIDS because they keep failing to get their lives ( somewhat) together after its been more than enough time and after all the ways we have tried to help them before?
I know I stopped catering a long time ago, once I Felt like my assistance had turned into an expectation , and once it became clear to me that SD didn't appreciate it anyway. Just throws this nonsense back in my face about how I "never accepted her" or whining how "no one has ever put her first" anyway. So , then why on earth should you actually want to help someone that ungrateful and just proves to you time and time again that she just love having all their problems, since  they werent interested in accepting any other solutions to better themselves ,.just repeats the same kind of poor choices that just create more problems for her. Then wonders why I decided to wash my hands of it, just leave her where she is at, just miserable with little to no direction in life, let it pan out how its going to. so long as no one makes it my burden again.
Bottom line is that I felt I had nothing to lose in the SD department since as JRI pointed out, theyve always resented us as stepmoms just about the whole time and are perpetually offended or ticked off a the world for something they think is unfair, because they cant accept that no one owes them anything at 30 years old. so why not take the plunge as placing some rules, responsibilities and expectations on them while under YOUR roof? I Hope that works in turning SD27 off to taking advantage of you for once and for all.