Welcome!!!
October fun facts
https://www.almanac.com/content/month-october-holidays-fun-facts-folklore
#cc6600
1 of 1- JRI
- Member
Online!
SD65's Current Grift
I know you all enjoy hearing about SD65 and her various ploys. She gets her disability on the first so we usually have a couple weeks of peace. But, I've been anticipating a message from her now that we are getting to mid-month. So, sure enough, there was a text asking me to have DH89 call her. I waited til after breakfast to tell him. I also told him it was elder abuse but he said "She's my daughter". About that time, I got a text from her daughter, C, asking me to call. I don't respond to SD's calls but I usually do to C's calls. So, I called but guess who answered? SD, supposedly her phone got wet so she had to use C's. The truth is either Verizon canceled service due to no payment or she knew I wouldn't answer her call. Anyway, she wanted to talk to DG89.
Todays emergency is her car needs tires. Since I don't believe a word she says, who knows. DH asked how much she needed,she usually replies, how much do you have? But today, it was $300. Another thing was that altho she and C live about 30 miles away, they were here within 5 minutes. They must have been waiting up the street.
So, the question is, will this hold her til the middle of next month? I used to love the holidays but now, the approach of Thanksgiving means more drama and needs. I have tried to be polite and civil but I find my response to her getting icier. Sigh...
Last edited by JRI (10/12/2026 4:41 pm)
- Kes
- Member
Offline
Re: SD65's Current Grift
I completely understand your response "getting icier". This kind of constant begging for money, especially in a person who should have been financially independent for many years, is sickening. It's a shame your DH feels he has to accede to every demand.
- Aniki-Moderator
- Aniki-Admin
Offline
Re: SD65's Current Grift
Sigh... sounds like it's time to delay answering C's calls. 
- advice.only2
- Member
Offline
Re: SD65's Current Grift
Can you just forget to tell DH this stuff? I mean what is she going to do? Whine to DH about you? Will he even remember at this point. "Oh oops I forgot." like why aren't you allowed to forget stuff on occasion?
- JRI
- Member
Online!
Re: SD65's Current Grift
Thanks for the support, everybody. I've starting ignoring C's texts and calls but last month, I responded to her "Emergency" text (SD's supposed imprisonment, ie request for bail $) and this time, I responded thinking she was warning me about something but surprise surprise, it was SD using her phone.
I've thought about not telling DH89 about her calls but I still feel he has the right to speak to her. He can't call out anymore so this is the only phone contact he has. Knowing her, if we didn't respond, she'd show up anyway saying "I was afraid something happened to you guys!". And, yes, she is perfectly capable of accusing me of keeping her from Dad and complaining to him about it.
I've thought about telling her I consider her grift as elder abuse but frankly, I don't think that would stop her, it would just aggravate her.. The sad thing about DH's memory loss is that he doesn't remember he gave her a sizeable amount a few weeks ago. Stay tuned, it never ends
Last edited by JRI (Yesterday 12:33 pm)
- •
Thread Starter- Aniki-Moderator
- Aniki-Admin
Offline
Re: SD65's Current Grift
Would it help to keep a record you can show your DH? Dates and amounts?
- JRI
- Member
Online!
Re: SD65's Current Grift
He wouldn't care. He has typically shielded the amount he gives her. The only reason I know now is I'm more involved with his cash now that his dementia is increasing. This latest tire scam - I could tell him that they got $ from OSS for tires recently and he'd blow it off. About the only thing I can do is keep his "allowance" the same and refuse any "emergency" trips to the bank. What she really wants is for him to buy her another car and I'm surprised he's not angling for it. He berates her, "What's wrong with you?" when she's here but it just rolls off her back. He probably does it for my benefit.
- •
Thread Starter- notarelative
- Member
Offline
Re: SD65's Current Grift
JRI wrote:
The only reason I know now is I'm more involved with his cash now that his dementia is increasing.
DH here has forgotten why he cut off money. If OSD showed up and asked, I believe he’d give it to her without hesitation. But, because years ago when he stopped the money train, she stopped calling and coming around, she has no idea of how much his memory has worsened. We only see her if we run into her in the community which is maybe once a year. DH has enough reserve that he can showcase for that brief amount of time as she never asks anything that is not superficial. And I am not going to inform her.
At the end of the money train, just before it derailed, he wasn’t giving her cash, he was paying bills directly. One of the last times it was because the electricity was going to be shut off. It was back when the company had a local office. He went there and asked, not for the whole bill amount, but how much for it to be turned back on. He paid just the turn on amount. Not well received.
The need to be vigilant is hard. (((JRI)))
Last edited by notarelative (Today 1:14 pm)