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1 of 1- JRI
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SD64, the drama never stops
SD64 got out of the hospital today after her seizure Friday. Broken shoulder and fractured arm from the fall. They gave her blood and iron, she always gets anemia. They scheduled her hernia surgery for February
To find out the real story about whether she'd been renting out the condo we bought for her to live in, I sicced YSD on the trail. My daughter and SIL had been going by but never saw a car tho she saw a light. He found out the truth and convinced C, SD64's daughter, to come clean with me. SD64 has been renting to a man for months. He works 2 jobs but has no car, the condo is on a bus route. C also told me that SD64 has not applied for an apartment at her complex as SD64 told me. I am so angry. DH88 is worried about her but I wish she'd just drop dead and do us all a favor.
Sorry to sound so cold at this season.
YSD64 is now a realtor in FL but he has a good friend who's a realtor here and they will share the commission when it's sold. So, he's been able to access real estate legal info for this state. SIL prepared a 10- day notice which we will post on the door. But, YSD wanted to speak to the tenant first, telling him we realize this is a bad time of year and we will give him some extra time, we will work with him. The tenant sounds like a decent guy. After they talk, we will post the notice.
C is stepping up to take in SD64. She is going to monitor the meds and Dr appts. When SD64 lives alone, she doesn't eat, take her meds correctly or follow up with doctors. I don't know how it's going to work out long term but it's not my prob. C took over cleaning for me so we will hear weekly how things are going, that will help DH88. I hope I never have to see her or talk to her again but as long as DH88 lives, she will be in my life, hopefully at a distant perifory.
I'm sure there will be more upset and theatrics. There's SD64's cat which C can't take due to her son's allergies. There's packing that will have to be done and moving. I just want the fu**er sold.
If there's a bright spot, it's the way the other kids have worked to make me aware of the situation, convince me that it's really happening, research the legalities, make calls, handle things diplomatically with DH88, and the tenant, too.
I guess every family has one bad apple, we have ours.
- Merry
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
Wow,JRI. I guess the lies are not a surprise, sadly. You are kind to be lenient with the tenant and I hope he is the kind of guy who leaves the place in good shape.
Thank goodness the others are stepping up to handle details. I know you will be relieved when this is all over.
- MorningMia
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
Your anger right now sounds very healthy to me. It will help spur you on and will ensure that you stand your ground in this clusterF of a situation. Hang tight!
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
- JRI
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
Last night, DH87 spoke with her. Tears, she wants to stay in the condo, she's under a doctor's care and is having an operation in February. He told her we wouldn't sell. I said no, we are selling. Then he told her he'd help her rent an apartment. When we got off the phone, I said do what you want but when you die I won't be paying it. I also reminded him the cardiologist is giving him 6 months unless he gets his valve transplant he's trying to dodge. He is now suddenly avid to get his transplant.
This morning, we asked who would be at DD59's tonight. I reeled off the guest list which didn't include SD64. He asked why, I said I didn't invite her, don't want to see her or talk to her. He said he was going to call her and if she wanted, meet her somewhere for Christmas instead of going to DD's. I said fine but he hasn't called her, he wanted me to but I said her number is on your phone.
I texted with YSS58, a realtor who is out of state but working with a realtor here. He doesn't like DH being pressured by SD. Although he hasn't spoken to her in years, called her to explain the sale procedure. She went thru her usual drama and lies. He told her to stop pressuring DH and find herself a place. He said he was handling everything, that JRI had enough on my plate taking care of DH. He said let's handle this so JRI has less animosity toward her. She actually asked why I would have animosity toward her! After he explained, she hung up on him. He said he'd almost forgotten why he initially went no contact with her but this brought it all back
So, DH is staying home tonight while I go to DD's. I never dreamed in my wildest dreams that I'd ever see YSS defending me. On and on.....
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Thread Starter- MorningMia
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
JRI wrote:
Last night, DH87 spoke with her. Tears, she wants to stay in the condo, she's under a doctor's care and is having an operation in February. He told her we wouldn't sell. I said no, we are selling. Then he told her he'd help her rent an apartment. When we got off the phone, I said do what you want but when you die I won't be paying it. I also reminded him the cardiologist is giving him 6 months unless he gets his valve transplant he's trying to dodge. He is now suddenly avid to get his transplant.
This morning, we asked who would be at DD59's tonight. I reeled off the guest list which didn't include SD64. He asked why, I said I didn't invite her, don't want to see her or talk to her. He said he was going to call her and if she wanted, meet her somewhere for Christmas instead of going to DD's. I said fine but he hasn't called her, he wanted me to but I said her number is on your phone.
I texted with YSS58, a realtor who is out of state but working with a realtor here. He doesn't like DH being pressured by SD. Although he hasn't spoken to her in years, called her to explain the sale procedure. She went thru her usual drama and lies. He told her to stop pressuring DH and find herself a place. He said he was handling everything, that JRI had enough on my plate taking care of DH. He said let's handle this so JRI has less animosity toward her. She actually asked why I would have animosity toward her! After he explained, she hung up on him. He said he'd almost forgotten why he initially went no contact with her but this brought it all back
So, DH is staying home tonight while I go to DD's. I never dreamed in my wildest dreams that I'd ever see YSS defending me. On and on.....
You know attempted or actual financial exploitation of a senior is legally considered elder abuse. (Just sayin')
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
- JRI
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
At DD's last night, I spoke with OSS62 and his wife. OSS is a very soft-hearted person and his wife is a good, religious person. He asked why DH was not there so I took them outside to explain. They already knew part of the story cuz SD64 had called him tearfully. I explained that we'd learned she'd been renting the condo at $240 a week for months while we paid all the expenses, thinking we were providing safe, nice shelter for her. I said I was totally done and we were selling it with YSS handling it all. OSS was worried about SD, where would she live? Memories of their childhood. He even suggested her living with them. I could see his wife making a "no" face. I told him, do what you want but when she lived with us, she stole my silver and jewelry, was always drugged up and wandered the house at night. She also robbed my neighbor. I told him, you guys need to figure out how you'll handle her calls cuz when DH passes, you'll be the only person locally she could call. They've already had some of these "emergency" calls, just recently for tires. I told them, do what you're going to do but don't let it break up your marriage cuz I know it can happen.
I can't do any more for them but at least I gave them a heads up. DIL is a smart person, she gets it
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Thread Starter- LittleTypeAmy
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Re: SD64, the drama never stops
I am so sorry that you got even more confirmation that SD64 hasnt changed her spots or stripes so to speak, But I feel like in a weird sort of way you NEEDED this to happen if only to gain more validation, more clarity even if anger or fury is involved even just so to give you the strength and resolve you need to put your foot down and keep it firmly planted on the ground where it belongs. If everyone else wants to come running to her rescue ,keep pitying her or keeping her from learning from life, because they want to act brand new and clueless as if they cant figure out for the life of them as to how SD can possibly have ended up the way she did. I say to continue to let them shoulder that burden if they feel so sorry for her..Let them learn for themselves why bailing her out is something they will regret. I also woudnt care anymore just so they know its not to fall on yours any more and not to come sniffing around you or DH for anything, YOu have done far far more than your share and more than other would have. or more than you should have. My SD is half your SD's age and i have already had reached my breaking point where I am no longer sticking my neck out like I used to, to try to make her happy or life more comfortable for her only for to keep finding new ways to screw her life up no matter what kind of help or guidance no matter who offered it to her. Like you, I am being honest when i say that I still dont care if I never have to deal with my SD ever again, and frankly , stopped worrying about what happens to her so long as she doesnt become my problem any more
Last edited by LittleTypeAmy (1/02/2026 3:58 pm)